Sunday, 28 August 2011

And here we go - getting ready to dive in !

It has taken me quite some time to launch this new blog. It is truly night and day compared to my baking blog, Lemon Drop. There I blog about my fat-laden, sugar infused desserts and my journey as a newbie food blogger and photographer. I love every moment of it: from the creation of a flaky puffed pastry or fluffy whipped buttercream to watching another take their first bite of one of my sweet creations. It brings me great joy and is a way for me to express this creative bone I seem to have in my body. I love Lemon Drop and intend to keep bringing my followers great recipes for many years to come.

But let me be honest, sometimes I wonder if Lemon Drop is also a veil I stand behind; a way to bake, bake, bake and all the while convince myself I have a good grasp of the concept of "moderation"; that I have some kind of so-called ability to stay on track health-wise while baking to my heart's delight. Some days I feel like Cybil. I ooh and awe over butter laden biscuits, fresh and golden from the oven, then cry a few tears when I realize my size 14s are too tight. So I hop on the rebounder, lift some weights and roll around on the stability ball for 1/2 hr. Don't get me wrong, the exercise does have incredible benefits and I definitely get a good ROI. But those size 14s tend to be tighter than looser most days.

The fact is, I have struggled with food and weight since I was a little kid. I was never a slim child and I gained and lost weight most of my life. Everything seemed to really come together for me though for most of my 20's.   I was an avid fitness buff, ate clean and basically was a "lean, mean, fightin' machine" . I loved the lifestyle, loved how I looked and felt - it was all working well...until tragedy struck in more ways then one. With that came weight gain.

I guess I would be deemed an "emotional eater". I think most people fall into that category. Unfortunately my emotions have been on a roller coaster ride for as long as I can remember until a few years ago when things settled down and a much needed peace came into my life. Though the peace and prosperity arrived, the weight seemed to enjoy hanging around along with it.

The past few years I spent a great deal of time practicing the art of self-love. I gave myself a break. I let myself indulge when I wanted to. I let myself take days, weeks, even months off good eating and exercise. I don't have any regrets about that either. I needed those times to put it all aside and just let myself breathe.

Now, don't get me wrong. I still have enough diet books in my house to wallpaper the great wall of China. I have read them all and I am sure tried 99% of the diets out there. I am one of millions.

So why am I going to go low carb? Why go right back into the diet craze I have come to loathe? Because I know reducing carbs works for me and works incredibly well. I had great success with that way of eating in the past. Granted, I gained what I lost back for no other reason than changing my mind about what I chose to consume on a daily basis. Why do I think this time will be different? Because the ME of days gone by is not the ME of today. I am not starting off this journey with any kind of self-hate (as I did all the other times) but with a lot of self-love. I want my body to be in the best condition it can be in and I want a fast return on investment! Patience has never been my strong point.

Will I still continue to bake all those goodies for Lemon Drop while I eat low carb? You betcha. A painter would still paint. A singer would still sing. A baker would still bake. I just don't have to eat all of my creations!

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